Marvel's March previews reviewed

(I like this one 'cuz Greg Land didn't make it)

AGENTS OF ATLAS #2
Written by JEFF PARKER
Pencils by CARLO PAGULAYAN & GABRIEL HARDMAN
Cover by GREG LAND
Variant Cover by ED MCGUINNESS
Norman Osborn's shadow government looks to pull ahead in the arms race with the help of the Atlas Foundation and the Uranian weaponry of the world's most bizarre defense contractor, Marvel Boy! The dark contacts grow even more solid when Jimmy Woo meets his understudy - Temujin, the son of the Mandarin! How does this all connect to one of the Agents' 1958 missions? Access M-11's datahold and find out!

Uh oh, I hope this is a 50/50 variant cover thing instead of one of those deals where I have to pay a bunch extra to get the variant. Because my desire to read Agents of Atlas and my goal of never bringing another piece of Greg Land's work into my home are in direct opposition here.



AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #589
Written by FRED VAN LENTE
Pencils by PAULO SIQUEIRA
Cover by KLAUS JANSON, CHRIS ELIOPOULOS & DEAN WHITE
CHARACTER ASSASSINATION may be over, but the troubles keep coming as Spidey's old nemesis THE SPOT returns deadlier than ever! Wait. Did we just use "The Spot" and "deadlier" in the same sentence? You better believe it -- with his teleportation powers, he's poised to make a name for himself as an unstoppable killer for hire, and the only thing standing between him and his latest target is your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man!

Spidey’s one of those characters that I like in general, but don’t feel any pressing need to actively follow just to see what he’s up to, particularly now that Marvel reneged on their side of the “let’s pretend this stuff is real” bargain and did away with the ongoing soap opera aspects of the character and his life. Well, they didn’t do away with it, they just started it over, but if I’m following Marvel Adventures Spider-Man and Ultimate Spider-Man, I see no reason to follow a third version.

So after the reboot, I’ve decided to just read ASM when I really like the writer and really like the artist.

I haven’t thought about what to do if I like the writer and the villain, but am neutral on the artist. Hmmm...Good thing I've got three months to think about it…



AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE FEATURING REPTIL #1
Written by CHRISTOS N. GAGE
Pencils by STEVE UY
Cover by HUMBERTO RAMOS
Stegron the Dinosaur Man and his dinosaur army launch a campaign of destruction across America! With the Fifty State Initiative in tatters from the fallout of Secret Invasion, Tigra must pull together a squad from the few superhumans still fit for duty, including Cloud 9, Komodo, Prodigy...and a brand new recruit. Be here for the debut of Marvel's newest superstar--REPTIL! Will he save the Initiative...or ruin it?
48 PGS./Rated T+ ...$3.99

"Stegron the Dinosaur Man" was really all I needed to get excited about this, but I like the sound of "dinosaur army," "Steve Uy" and even the dumb-ass flagrantly and x-tremely misspelled codename “Reptil.” X-tremeasaurus is really the only way to improve on that name.

Oh, and check it out. This is $3.99, but it’s 48 pages. Usually these read “32 PGS” and 10 of those are ads, so you get 22 pages of story. So is this actually oversized, and we get 38 pages of story, or does that just mean Marvel sold a bunch more ads than usual? I dunno.




INCREDIBLE HERCULES #127
Written by FRED VAN LENTE & GREG PAK
Penciled by DIETRICH SMITH
Cover by DAVE WILLIAMS
King Variant by TBA
As Hera consolidates her takeover of Olympus, marking Hercules and Athena for death, she reaches out to forge an alliance with the greatest mortal power on the planet -- NORMAN OSBORN! With the forces of Heaven and Earth both arrayed against our heroes, how can they possibly survive? And what role does the ex-New Warrior AEGIS play in Hera's mad scheme?

Um, what the hell's a “King variant?” A picture of the title character wearing a crown? Repurposed Jack Kirby art found lying around the Marvel backroom? What? Anyway, these seem to be this month's zombie/monkey/skrull/villain variant theme.



Oh man, is there anything more embarrassing than showing up to battle and realizing too late that you've completely forgotten to put on pants?



SPIDER-MAN Y LA ANTORCHA HUMANA EN...¡BAHIA DE LOS MUERTOS! EDICIÓN BORICUA EN ESPAÑOL
Written by TOM BELAND
Art & Cover by JUAN DOE
¡Los 4 Fantásticos regresan a Puerto Rico! Y esta vez, la Antorcha Humana trae a su buen amigo...¡el Hombre Araña! En Vieques, la Isla Nena – un paraíso terrenal a la costa este de Puerto Rico – ¡ha surgido un gran peligro! ¿Qué ha causado que las aguas brillantes más preciosas del mundo se conviertan en una bestia carnívora?! Nuestros héroes se enfrentan al terror de la bahía bioluminiscente...¿y quién será el amigo inesperado quien único los puede ayudar? Tom Beland y Juan Doe, los creadores de LOS 4 FANTÁSTICOS: ¡ISLA DE LA MUERTE!, lanzan una nueva aventura puertorriqueña...¡disponible en esta súper-especial edición boricua en español!
48 PGS./One-Shot/Rated A ...$3.99

Look, I can't make heads or tails of this, except for all the ands and thes, but I'm pretty sure this is going to be awesome, because the creative team's Fantastic Four one-shot was awesome. Also, I can’t imagine something co-starring "La Antoracha Humana" won’t turn out pretty well.


SPIDER-MAN & THE HUMAN TORCH IN...¡BAHÍA DE LOS MUERTOS!
Written by TOM BELAND
Art & Cover by JUAN DOE
The Fantastic Four are going back to Puerto Rico! And this time, the Human Torch is bringing his good buddy Spider-Man along for the ride! Off the coast of Puerto Rico, the small, paradise-like island of Vieques is home to plants, animals, people, and the world's most beautiful glowing waters. But what deadly secret has turned the tranquil bay into...a giant radioactive monster?! And what unlikely ally turns out to be the only one who can help our heroes now? By Tom Beland and Juan Doe, the guys behind the madcap, heartwarming, fan-mega-favorite FANTASTIC FOUR: ¡ISLA DE LA MUERTE!
48 PGS./One-Shot/Rated A ...$3.99

Oh, nevermind. Yes, that looks pretty awesome.



Aaaaaaa! Okay, so here's the Todd Nauck cover for aaaaa! some kind of book about Wolverine that aaaaaaaaaaa! is some kinda fake autobiography illustrated with Marvel art through the ages and aaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Aaaaaaaaaaaa! AAAaaaaaaaaaaaaa-- (choke!)


WOLVERINE: FIRST CLASS #13
Written by PETER DAVID
Penciled by RONAN CLIQUET
Cover by DAVID WILLIAMS
Fan-favorite PETER DAVID comes to the First Classiverse! Kitty Pryde usually likes museums, but wouldn't you know it...the art gallery that Wolverine's taken her to is run by the evil HAND (they're Ninja types), which means that DAREDEVIL & ELEKTRA can't be too far away from the action...

Well it ain’t Van Lente, but something tells me this Peter David fellow will be able to tell a solid light-hearted superhero story just fine.

Quick question: I see the term "First Classiverse" in there; it was my understanding the First Class books were canon/continuity...but apparently not? I suppose that would actually make a lot of X-fans happy; me, I'm so completely unfamiliar with X-Men history that I couldn't even tell if these things adhered to continuity or not, but I've heard complaining that would indicate they're not exactly religious about it.




Adrien Brody? Is that you?