DC's July previews reviewed

Today is Easter Monday, yes, but it is also DC Solicits Monday, a "holiday" that comes once a month! And I celebrate by asking you to go to ComicsAlliance and/or Comic Book Resources and reading them in full, so you'll know what I'm talking about as I point and laugh and/or shake my head sadly at DC's publishing plans for July of 2012.


That’s the cover of Action Comics. I hope that’s an image of Superman flying through the sun n order to burn off his new costume, destroying it forever, before flying back to his Fortress of Solitude to put on his old duds.


ALL-STAR WESTERN #11
Written by JUSTIN GRAY and JIMMY PALMIOTTI
Art by MORITAT
Backup story art by SCOTT KOLINS
Cover by RAFA GARRES
On sale JULY 25 • 40 pg, FC, $3.99 US • RATED T+
• JONAH HEX and TALLULAH BLACK face the Lord of Assassins’ steam-powered death machine.
• Introducing TERRENCE 13 in a new backup story!

Oh shit, is that Dr. Thirteen’s great-grandfather…?!

If so, that is legitimately cool.

Have they collected the first half of this series yet? Are they collecting the back-ups too, or saving them for their own collection? Is All-Star Western still set on the East Coast...?


Part of me wishes that when they rebooted the DCU, they just went ahead and put the word “Dark” at the beginning of each title. So that you’re no longer reading Aquaman and thinking, “Did DC put an image of fuckign Aquaman looking pissed off while he jabs his trident into the eye of the severed head of Black Manta, the sea and sky raging in storm behind him?”

Instead you’re thinking, “Ha ha, look at how silly the cover for this month’s issue of Dark Aquaman is! Dark Aquaman! I'll never get over how silly this book is...!”


BATGIRL #11
Written by GAIL SIMONE
Art by ARDIAN SYAF and VICENTE CIFUENTES
Cover by STANLEY “ARTGERM” LAU
On sale JULY 11 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T
• Part two-of the introduction of KNIGHTFALL – BATGIRL’S deadliest foe yet!
• BATGIRL takes on three new foes – the henchmen of GOTHAM CITY’S new super-villain, KNIGHTFALL!

If you think Knightfall is deadly Batgirl, you should try to face KnightQuest: The Crusade some time…


DC COMICS PRESENTS: WONDER WOMAN ADVENTURES #1
Written by STEVE VANCE and PAUL DINI
Art by JOHN DELANEY, RON BOYD and BRUCE TIMM
Cover by JOHN DELANEY and RON BOYD
On sale JULY 25 • 96 pg, FC, $7.99 US
• A new, all-ages collection featuring WONDER WOMAN in action with the JUSTICE LEAGUE, GREEN LANTERN, CATWOMAN and CHEETAH!
• Collects ADVENTURES IN THE DC UNIVERSE #1, 3, 11 and 19

Say, DC apparently overheard one of the dozens of people online say something about how it’s too bad there aren’t any Wonder Woman comics that little girls could read, seeing as how little girls and their parents, like males aged 16-66, also have money, and some of them even like Wonder Woman and comics.

I suppose it’s telling that to find enough comics to fill up a DCP volume, they had to go all the way back to the the short-lived 1997-98 series that gave the entire DC Univesre the same all-ages treatment that the various books based on Batman: The Aniamted Series and Superman: The Animated Series got. (That series was, by the way, more than 10 years ago, which means it predates Dan DiDio's presence at DC. Is this a coincidence? Maybe!)

It was a great series, and I loved almost every story in every issue—the first issue wasn't so hot, but the Vane/Delaney issues were all really solid. The Impulse/Martian Manhunter team-up and the Superboy/Flash race were among my favorites, although I think the series was notable for doing some of the best DC-published Captain Marvel stories and for showing how easy it is to make DC’s legacy concepts new-reader friendly (There was an issue, for example, where Green Lantern Kyle Rayner and Green Arrow Conner Hawke teamed up, which flash-backed to a Silver Age team-up starring the late Hal Jordan and the late Oliver Queen).

The Wonder Woman stories listed above are three lead stories—almost every issue featured a longer cover feature and a shorter back-up—in which she fights her archenemy The Cheetah (designed as an animated version of the George Perez were-cheetah look), teams up with Green Lantern Kyle Rayner, and then has a bit of a Marvel-style team-up with Catwoman, who is attempting to steal her magic lasso (Say, that cover’s got a lot of torn-off clothing for a “kid’s” comic, doesn’t it?). The first issue is, if I recall, a full-length, 22-page Justice League story, so maybe that’s here for filler. It does co-star Wondy, even if it’s not exactly her story. (The League, by the way, is the “Adventures” style version of the Big Seven line-up at the start of Grant Morrison, Howard Porter and John Dell’s JLA, with Wally and Kyle as Flash and GL, and Aquaman has his beard and harpoon hand.

I have all these comics, so I won’t be purchasing it, but, if you haven’t read ‘em, I’d recommend it.

I wonder if there are enough Wonder Woman-specific stories in the various Justice League comics that DC published around the time the Cartoon Network JL cartoon was on the air that they could do a #2 or #3 of this…?


I honestly don’t want to know what’s happening on the cover of this issue of Deathstroke, but I sure as hell hope it comes polybagged.


EARTH 2 #3
Written by JAMES ROBINSON
Art by NICOLA SCOTT and TREVOR SCOTT
Cover by IVAN REIS and JOE PRADO
On sale JULY 4 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T
• The all-new origin of ALAN SCOTT GREEN LANTERN – unlike any GL origin that's come before!
• The debut of the all-new HAWKGIRL!
• And Jay Garrick, THE FLASH, meets his first Super Hero!

Here’s your new Earth 2 Green Lantern Alan Scott! Not only does his costume seem to be “Basically Hal Jordan’s, but with a handle on his lamp logo,” but he also seems to be buring alive, with the flesh already evaporating from his skeletal hand.

Coupled with the cover of the previous issue, in which we saw The Flash Jay Garrick shrieking while running through a sewer and being swarmed by monstrous rats, I would guess the selling point of this new series is that being a superhero is horrible, and akin to being in hell.

Wait, that can’t be right, can it…?


GREEN ARROW #11
Written by ANN NOCENTI_Art by HARVEY TOLIBAO
Cover by HOWARD PORTER
On sale JULY 4 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T
• Beginning a new story in which OLIVER QUEEN returns to action in Seattle to discover that the city has fallen into the gutters during his absence.
• Who are the DARK ARROWS?

So the de-aged, newer, younger, more inexperienced Green Arrow still moved to Seattle for a few years then….?

I hate you so much reboot!

This issue will have the Dark Arrows, whoever they are, in it. Wouldn’t it be cool if this book was called Dark Green Arrow? Yes. Yes it would. I repeat: They should call all these books Dark Whatever.

Dark Superman, Dark Wonder Woman, Dark Justice League, Dark Justice League Dark, Dark Dial H For Hero, Dark DC Universe Presents, Dark The Savage Hawkman, The Dark Fury of Firestorm…


I, VAMPIRE #11
Written by JOSHUA HALE FIALKOV_Art by ANDREA SORRENTINO
Cover by CLAYTON CRAIN
On sale JULY 25 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T+
• Vampires. Versus. Zombies. Exclamation point!!
• What happens when a zombie bites a vampire? What happens when a vampire turns a zombie? Find out all the gory details here!

I thought Fred Van Lente covered this in his Marvel Zombies 3 series…?

What did Zombie Morbius, The Living Vampire call himself…? Oh yeah, that's right.



National Comics: Eternity #1
Written by JEFF LEMIRE
Art and cover by CULLY HAMNER
On sale JULY 25 • 40 pg, FC, $3.99 US • RATED T
• An exciting new series of stand-alone comics that feature unique takes on classic characters!
• JEFF LEMIRE (ANIMAL MAN) and CULLY HAMNER (RED) bring a contemporary approach to the hero we used to know as KID ETERNITY!
• Can introverted medical examiner Kid Eternity solve a deadly crime in just 24 hours?

I read this a few hours before I saw the solicits, and it named the next few characters as well as the different-character-each-issue format.

It doesn't sound like it will last long, and I have no idea why they decided to revive that particular title over all the other options available to them, or why they're launching a second title that seems almost identical in premise to DC Presents, but I will probably at least look at that first issue, given my affection for the character Kid Eternity.

He's one of the many, many characters that DC now owns that sounds so great when you read about their Golden Age adventures, but then when you read what DC actually does with him and you usually just feel a little disappointed, if not some combination of depressed and grossed-out. At least, that's how I generally feel.

This doesn't sound like Lemire's take is going to be "right" either, given that he is now an introverted medical examiner, which sounds more like the pitch for a 10 p.m. drama than a revival of a Golden Age superhero for a comic book.

Also, medical examiner's have to go to college right? Then that would make "Kid" Eternity at least 22-ish, right? Do you need a master's degree, which would make him 24-ish? I don't think he even counts as a "Kid" at that point...


RED LANTERNS #11
Written by PETER MILLIGAN_Art by MIGUEL SEPULVEDA
Cover by ED BENES_On sale JULY 4 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T+
• There’s going to be hell to pay as ATROCITUS continues his lone search for ABYSMUS and more poisoned members of his corps die!
• RED LANTERN BLEEZ vs. STAR SAPPHIRE FATALITY!
• With the entire corps poisoned, only a handful of RED LANTERNS are left alive!

Abysmus is a pretty funny name…almost as funny as Atrocitus. I like that these sound like names George Lucas brainstormed but ultimately decided not to use for being a little too scary.

By the way, has Red Lantern Bleez (sounds like “Bleeds”! Ha! Another good one!) always had garters connecting her skintight costumet to her skintight leggings? I never noticed them before seeing this image.


What’s this? Superman’s new costume beign eaten by invisible electro-moths?! Go invisible electro-moths, go!


Baltazar’s Streaky is terrifying because of how inscrutable he is. Beppo, Krypto and that super-mouse with the nice head of hair all look pretty happy and thus don’t seem to mean Jimmy any harm, but look at Streaky’s face. What is he thinking? What does he want? Seeing him flying like you with that expression, it’s easy to see why he would make Jimmy run and activate his signal watch.


TEEN TITANS #11
Written by SCOTT LOBDELL
Art and cover by BRETT BOOTH and NORM RAPMUND...
On sale JULY 25 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US • RATED T
• WONDER GIRL’S past revealed – while her armor revolts!

That’s right, Wonder Girl’s armor is revolting! You heard the solicitation copy writer.


WONDER WOMAN #11
Written by BRIAN AZZARELLO
Art and cover by CLIFF CHIANG
...
• A new story begins as APOLLO makes his play for ZEUS’S throne – and WONDER WOMAN is the last obstacle in his way!_• As ZOLA goes into labor, a hideous secret is revealed!

Uh-oh, Zola’s going into labor? So, like, about 9 months have passed in the “New 52” timeline during the course of eleven of our months? Oh man, they’re gonna have to reboot their timeline again in another five years at this rate!


WORLD’S FINEST TP
Written by DAVE GIBBONS
Art by STEVE RUDE and KARL KESEL
Cover by STEVE RUDE
On sale AUGUST 8 • 176 pg, FC, $17.99 US
• SUPERMAN and BATMAN take on their archnemeses — LEX LUTHOR and THE JOKER – in this classic tale by DAVE GIBBONS and STEVE RUDE!
• Collecting the 3-issue miniseries from 1990!

I read this a very, very long time ago—so long ago that I can’t remember many details—but I do distinctly remember liking it a whole lot. Did it go out of print at some point, and that’s why it’s being solicited now? Well, if you haven’t seen it before, at least give it a look—it’s Steve Rude drawing Batman, Superman and their casts!


I like this image of Huntress just kinda hanging out, watching Power Girl wrestle with a flaming, crashing jet plane. Especially when considered along with the previous month’s cover, on which Power Girl was getting shot by a giant robot’s super-laser, while Huntress stood in the background and aimed her cross bow impotently.

These covers suggest that maybe Worlds' Finest—not to be confused with World's Finest, above—will be a series about Power Girl sruggling to good, super-heroic deeds, even if it means she occasionally get the shit kicked out of her, while her partner Huntress watches.

"Where were you when that robot was shooting me in the butt with red sun energy, Helena?"

"What are you talking about? I shot, like, three crossbow bolts at him! His armor was pretty much impenetrable! To crossbow bolts."