Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Marvel's December previews reviewed

What's this? Marvel's new corporate master (the un-frozen head of Walt Disney atop one of the animatronic figures from the Pirates of the Caribbean attraction) hasn't suspended the publication of paper and staple, floppy funny books in favor of animated cartoons? Marvel's still going to be publishing these things in December, and still charging way too much for many of them? Looks like.

So, what do the first post-acquisition announcement solicitations look like? Like this:


AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #615
Written by FRED VAN LENTE
Penciled by JAVIER PULIDO
Cover by PAOLO MANUEL RIVERA
A locked room mystery! A string of brutal murders! A missing girl! One of Peter Parker's closest friends on the brink of ruin! This looks like a job for the Amazing Spider-Sleuth... and all clues point to the sinister SANDMAN! But all of Spidey's classic villains are being reinvented as part of "THE GAUNTLET", and Sandy is no different -- so nothing is what it seems!
32 PGS./Rated A ...$2.99


Hmm. Will the Sandman get a new hairstyle? A new shirt? Or both?!


BLACK WIDOW & THE MARVEL GIRLS #1 & 2 (of 4)
Written by PAUL TOBIN
Pencils by SALVA ESPIN (issue 1)
Pencils by JACOPO CAMAGNI (issue 2)
Covers by SALVA ESPIN
She's the most efficient spy in the world and one of the world's deadliest women, but before there was ever a Black Widow, there was the Red Room, a brutal KGB training ground for assassins, undercover agents, and the most ruthless of spies. Now, tasked with removing a rogue weapon's dealer from an impregnable safe house, the Black Widow remembers her escape from the Red Room training facility, an escape only made possible with the aid of the most unlikely of allies, the Asgardian sorceress known as Amora...the Enchantress.
THEN IN ISSUE 2, fitting in with the Avengers is not an easy job, not for a woman with no true powers beyond years of training and a ruthless ambition to succeed at any given task, and after a midair battle separates the Black Widow from the rest of her team, the mission to protect an advanced robot just got harder. Luckily, the Black Widow has her skills on her side, and the Avenger known as the Wasp at her back. Unluckily, the robot's owner is Dr. Doom, and Latveria's despotic ruler will stop at nothing to reclaim his own.
32 PGS. (EACH)/Rated A ...$2.99 (EACH)


Hmm. I think this solicit could have been better written. I’ve read it twice now, and I’m not really sure I understand what this series is all about exactly. Team-ups between Black Widow and random female superheroes, maybe…?

Paul Tobin’s involved, so I do want to understand it…


CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WILL WIELD THE SHIELD?
Written by ED BRUBAKER
Pencils & Cover by BUTCH GUICE
Steve Rogers has returned, but Bucky Barnes is the current Captain America, and has come into his own in the role. Will there be two Captain Americas? Will Bucky go back to being the Winter Soldier? What will happen? Decisions, decisions, decisions....
32 PGS./Rated T+ ...$3.99


Who will have the chance to say, "Do you think this A stands for France?" Whose cell phone will have the Cap ap? Who will get to do things wearing a cowl with little white wings? Who will make villains say they've tangled with a hero star-spangled? Who--

Okay, I'll stop.


I kinda like this dude's hat. I wish I had a job where I could get away with wearing a hat like that.


ED HANNIGAN: COVERED
Master artist Ed Hannigan did many of Marvel’s cover layouts of the late ’70s and early ’80s. Over that time, Ed created some of the most innovative cover designs ever. His covers for The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe and Peter Parker, The Spectacular Spider-Man still stand today as some of the finest of all time!
Today, Ed is 58 years old and has multiple sclerosis. Through special arrangement with the Hero Initiative, Marvel is offering Ed Hannigan: Covered, a massive 48-page collection of Ed’s covers, designs he created for other artists, and even rare glimpses at licensing and merchandising art Ed did. Best of all, proceeds benefit Ed Hannigan directly!
This volume also features a new cover by Ed, and new tribute pieces from Mark Millar, Michael Avon Oeming, Jim Valentino, Herb Trimpe, and more!
NOTE: There will be ONLY ONE PRINTING OF THIS BOOK EVER! Get it now so you don’t blow your chance!
48 pages...$5.99


Please consider buying this, and/or making a donation to the Hero Initiative.


Check this out:

ENDER'S GAME: COMMAND SCHOOL #4 (of 5)
Creative Director ORSON SCOTT CARD
Written by CHRISTOPHER YOST
Pencils & Cover by PASQUAL FERRY
Ender has graduated from Battle School to Command School where he'll prepare for the approaching Formic invasion...but he refuses to go. Ender's done playing the games, he's done hurting people. So the military brings in the only person who Ender cares about to convince him to go...his sister Valentine. And in the outer reaches of space, Ender meets the man who will be his last teacher...
Mazer Rackham.
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$3.99

ENDER'S GAME: WAR OF GIFTS
Creative Director ORSON SCOTT CARD
Written by JAKE BLACK
Pencils & Cover by TIMOTHY GREEN II
Zeck Morgan was raised by his minister father to be a pious, God-fearing child, devoted to his church. Unfortunately, when the International Fleet decides Zeck is a candidate for training in Battle School, they tear him from his home and prepare him for war. Zeck refuses to participate in the school’s war-games due to his pacifist religious beliefs. When he sees another student celebrating Christmas--seemingly violating Battle School's rules against religious practice--he raises an uproar that may tear Battle School apart. Can even Ender Wiggin calm this furor? Find out in this double-sized adaptation of Orson Scott Card’s Ender Universe novella, War of Gifts.
56 PGS./One-Shot/Parental Advisory ...$4.99

ENDER'S SHADOW: COMMAND SCHOOL #4 (of 5)
Creative Director ORSON SCOTT CARD
Written by MIKE CAREY
Pencils by SEBASTIAN FIUMARA
Cover by TIMOTHY GREEN II
The dramatic adaptation of Orson Scott Card’s science-fiction classic reaches its penultimate chapter! Battle School seems strangely empty without Ender Wiggin - and Bean has finally been cleared to join him in the labyrinthine warrens of Eros and Command School. But before he can go, there's one last thing he has to do: put his life in the hands of his oldest and most terrifying enemy...
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$3.99


I normally avoid mentioning Orson Scott Card comics altogether, as whatever the virtue of his novels, his stance on gay rights and the way he communicates it marks him as a super-asshole. But that seems like an awful lot of Ender/Orson Scott Card comics to be coming out in a single month, doesn't it? I guess they're doing okay for Marvel, then.

Dude's still an asshole though.


FALL OF THE HULKS ALPHA
Written by JEFF PARKER
Pencils by PAUL PELLETIER
Cover by ED MCGUINNESS
Variant Cover by DAVID FINCH
M.O.D.O.K. The Leader. Mad Thinker. Egghead. Red Ghost and the Super-Apes. Doctor Doom. They make up the secret group who have analyzed every victory and every defeat in the Marvel Universe to create the perfect battle plan that results in FALL OF THE HULKS! The origins and shocking truths of some of Marvel's most dangerous villains are revealed as the biggest HULK EVENT yet begins! From fan-favorite creators JEFF PARKER (AGENTS OF ATLAS) and PAUL PELLETIER (WAR OF KINGS) comes this tale of the “Smartest There Is” and their quest to prove it, once and for all.
32 PGS./Rated T+ ...$3.99


Parker! Pelletier! Awesome Marvel villains! This sounds gr--$3.99? Godammit, Marvel! This one probably won't even be worth getting in a trade somewhere down the line either, since it's probably going to end up in a book next to some dumb-ass series of Jeph Loeb "written" splash pages. Feh.


HULK: WINTER GUARD
Written by DAVID GALLAHER
Pencils & Cover by STEVE ELLIS
Hot on the heels of their acclaimed series 'High Moon', David Gallaher and Steve Ellis unite to reveal the secrets behind Russia's elite superhuman strike force! Red Guardian, Crimson Dynamo, Ursa Major & Darkstar -- As THE Winter Guard, they have sworn to protect the people of Russia. But, who will protect them when The Presence's schemes threaten to claim one of their own? Featuring an oversized all-new story and reprinting the classic Peter David and Dale Keown tale from INCREDIBLE HULK #393!
56 PGS./One-Shot/New & Reprint/Rated T+ ...$3.99


I really like Ursa Major as a character/name/concept/design/what have you, although I don't know that I've read more than a cameo or two featuring him before. This is $4, but will give us a reprint for the extra buck, so I may give this a shot. I really liked what I saw of Ellis' work in one of those 70th Anniversary Specials too...


MARVEL ADVENTURES SUPER HEROES #18
Written by PAUL TOBIN
Penciled by IG GUARA
Cover by NIKO HENRICHON
The Avengers assemble with two new team members, one a cocky rookie with cosmic powers, and another the world's most talented secret agent. But will even the combined powers of the Mighty Avengers be a match for the ghost of an old world giant that's been terrorizing Britain? It's a new Avengers versus the Old World, with the life of an entire village at stake!
32 PGS./All Ages ...$2.99


That is a very neat cover. It's safe to assume that the "cocky rookie with cosmic powers" must be Nova, but who would "the world's most talented secret agent" be? Black Widow? Or could it be someone having to a connection to Britain, which is here being terrorized, like The Black Knight? Probably Widow.


THE MARVELOUS LAND OF OZ #2 (of 8)
Written by ERIC SHANOWER
Pencils & Cover by SKOTTIE YOUNG
The further adventures of Oz continue! ERIC SHANOWER (Age of Bronze) and SKOTTIE YOUNG (X-MEN) further adapt the amazing adventures of Tip, Scarecrow, and Jack Pumpkinhead as they face the frantic and fantastic aspects of the Land of Oz.
32 PGS./All Ages ...$3.99


Still $1-to-$1.49 more expensive than DC, Boom Studio's and Marvel's own kids comics!


NOMAD: GIRL WITHOUT A WORLD #4 (of 4)
Written by SEAN MCKEEVER
Penciled by DAVID BALDEON
Cover by RAFAEL ALBERQUERQUE
The student body at Rikki's school has gone mad, and the combined efforts of NOMAD, FALCON and the YOUNG AVENGERS may not be enough to save them as the SECRET EMPIRE's wicked plan kicks into high gear!
32 PGS./Rated A ...$3.99


Hey, maybe McKeever could write a Young Avengers ongoing for Marvel? Maybe? And if it turns out to be totally awesome, Marvel could be like, "See, McKeever wrote our teen superhero team and it ruled, while he wrote DC's and it did the opposite of rule. That means DC edtorial is incompetent and we are the best! Mar-vel! Mar-vel! Mar-vel!"


POWERS #2
Written by BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS
Pencils & Cover by MICHAEL AVON OEMING
POWERS continues its monthly comeback!! Following the shocking revelations about Walker's past in our first issue, we dig deeper into the mysterious death of Z, the leader of the super hero rat pack of yesteryear. All this PLUS the long-awaited return of the Powers Personals! That's right!! Will Kick-Ass get you a girl? No. Will Incognito get you a honey? Pretty unlikely. Will Kabuki get you-- Well, Kabuki will probably get you a threesome but...Powers is back!!
40 PGS./Mature ...$3.95


Just a reminder: Marvel Comics is run by the fourth-grade class from a local all-boys school in New York City.


PUNISHER #12
Written by RICK REMENDER
Penciled by TONY MOORE
Cover by MIKE McKONE
“FRANKEN-CASTLE,” PART 2
The Punisher is dead, so who, or what, is the giant patchwork monster skulking through the tunnels under New York? And what do those strange armored Japanese hunters tracking him want? Criminals are no longer being killed; they are simply vanishing into thin air. Listen closely, you can hear their pleas far below the streets. Those forgotten by society have a new protector. The Legion of Monsters has found a new leader.
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$2.99


Sure, I'll take one of these.


SIEGE: THE CABAL
Written by BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS
Penciled by MICHAEL LARK
Cover by DAVID FINCH
THE SIEGE STARTS HERE!! Remember when you were first introduced to the Cabal, the gathering of the most sinister members of the Marvel Universe, and you said to yourself: Well, that's going to blow up in everyone's face! Well, you were right and it happens right here!! Norman Osborn faces off with Doctor Doom and his mysterious threat to Doom is revealed. All of this is setting the stage for next month's explosive event: SIEGE!
48 PGS./One-Shot/Rated T+ ...$3.99


Er, really? How long should it take Dr. Doom to completely wreck Norman Osborn? Like, two panels? A page?



I can't decide if I hate this Spider-Man costume, or love it. Nor can I decide if my affection for Jeff Parker's past work would override my resistance to new stories set in this world. I guess I'll have until the trade come out to decide, as this is another $4 comic.


I’m trade-waiting this Torch series, but that cover looks pretty bad-ass, doesn't it?


VENGEANCE OF THE MOON KNIGHT #4
Written by GREGG HURWITZ
Penciled by JEROME OPE√ĎA
Cover by LEINIL FRANCIS YU
“SHOCK AND AWE,” PART 4
Stare into the abyss too long, sometimes it stares back at you. Sometimes it reaches out and drowns you. Bushman is back and he’s emptied Ravencroft Asylum, flooding the streets with a torrential wave of homicidal maniacs. As Moon Knight desperately races to be the hero he always strived to be, the question is, can he afford not to go a little crazy?
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$2.99


When your main character is a pretty blatant Batman knock-off, do you really want to put him in a comic with the same conflict as Batman: Knightfall?


X-MEN NOIR: MARK OF CAIN #1 (of 4)
Written by FRED VAN LENTE
Pencils & Cover by DENNIS CALERO
Variant Cover by DENNIS CALERO
"In the dark and steamy jungles of Madripoor, the flashing claws of Logan, the blazing bullets of Cyclops, and the dashing fists of the Angel met with wave after wave of beserk headhunters, all willing to protect the secrets of the Temple-Tomb of Cyttorak with their lives! The ancient treasure map of mercenary Cain Marko, with its siren-song of the priceless gigantic ruby of the fabled god-king, had lured them only into the icy claws of Death!"
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$3.99


That doesn't sound a whole heck of a lot like a noir story, does it?

9 comments:

Parker said...

See, I think you'll like Ramon Rosanas art enough in the 1602 story to justify the price. I hopes, anyway.

As for the Fall O' Hulks, that's actually a 30 page story, and an extra eight pages for one more dollar is actually a better deal by a little bit. Same thing with X-Men vs. Atlas, I see people complaining about the 3.99, but they're getting exactly that much more story, it's relative. When it's for the same 22 page count, I understand.

Anyway, didn't mean to come in and prattle, I love EDILW. You're the sanity in the Internet!

LurkerWithout said...

That last one does sound more pulp than noir. But the two genres are close enough I'd give them a pass on it...

Hdefined said...

Is the text for Siege: The Cabal actually trying to promote predictability as a good thing? Holy shit.

Caleb said...

Anyway, didn't mean to come in and prattle

Feel free to come in and prattle any time. Besides, you just sold me on a comic.

jason quinones said...

- i don't wanna prattle on either but i've actually drawn and posted on my art blog (jasonsartblog.blogspot.com) a nightmarishly funny marvel/disney merger scenario that you might enjoy.

- that torch/namor cover is pretty badass!

- unless you have evil, glowing red eyes, a face completely devoid of any definition and it's completely covered in black shadow, i don't think that hat, cool as it may be, would work for anybody.

censustaker said...

If Spider-Man was wearing Iron-Man Armor I'd say a fight with Doom would last half an issue. So Norman, who's only a glider and a pumpin bomb or two belong spidey's equal in straight combat, wearing iron patriot armor, thats not as good as iron-mans suit but still isn't crap, should at least last 6 pages I reckon.

Jeremy H said...

"When your main character is a pretty blatant Batman knock-off, do you really want to put him in a comic with the same conflict as Batman: Knightfall?"

The title of issue #1 of the series was "The White Knight," so I think they're going with blatant on this one.

Tony said...

>I kinda like this dude's hat. I wish I had a job where I could get away with wearing a hat like that.

You're a freelancer, right? I think you should go ahead and do it.

Kid Kyoto said...

Why are they still doing 1602 stories when they could be doing books with Joss Whedon's turn of the century steampunk Wonders?

There's even a Punisher analogue to keep the kids happy!